Proverbs - Wisdom for our words

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For the rest of us, we're going to continue in Proverbs, so have your Bibles ready there. We'll spend a bit of time in Proverbs chapter 10 this morning, but like I said earlier, we're going to be moving around a bit. We do have the references on the slides. We'll put those up on the website sometime during the week. If you want them early before they get up there, just give us a yell in the office and we can send them to you. But they do make it to the website, it's a good resource for you to check out past messages if you've missed something in the series, but that's where we're going to be this morning. Let's just pause for a word of prayer. Father God, we just want to thank you so much for your Word, for the way in which you lead us in the way of wisdom. Father, we pray as we open your Word this morning that we might indeed come to understand and discover what you have to say to us about this whole topic of wise words. Lord, we want to hear your voice and be obedient to what it is that you are saying to us this morning. We pray that in Jesus' name, amen. Words are not just from our tongue, they come from our whole body. There's this process of neurological and physiological interactions that happens in order for us to speak. Now I'm not a speachy, you have to ask a speachy to get them to tell you this in its entirety, but from some of the things I discovered during the week, our speech begins as an electrical impulse in our brains. There are parts that are responsible for speech, regions that organize our thoughts and select appropriate responses and they generate words and instructions that then get sent to our muscles that are involved in speech. The brain transmits these instructions via nerve impulses through nerves that send signals to the muscles in our chest, in our throat, in our face and mouth and they guide the precise movements that we need in order to speak. Speaking and speech also requires air, which comes from our lungs as our intercostal muscles expand and contract our rib cages, allowing us to breathe in and out as our diaphragm, that dome shaped muscle beneath our lungs, works to expand our rib cage and lungs, allows more air to fill our lungs so that it can move upward through our trachea, through our windpipe and towards our larynx. Then there are the muscles that are around our vocal cords, these two bands of flexible muscle tissue that they adjust the tension and the positioning of our vocal cords, they produce the sound waves that we hear and that raw sound from the vocal cords moves up towards the pharynx, the mouth, the nasal cavities through the muscles in our tongues and the soft palate and our jaw and all of this kind of rapidly adjusts the shape of the sound forming recognizable syllables and words. We have this super agile muscle, the tongue, which we talked about before, that maneuvers around our mouth with precision against our teeth, against the palate, against our gums and it creates the consonants and the vowels that are made through this airflow. The result is then our lips and our facial muscles refine the shape of the sound and allow this nuanced articulation. It's an incredible synchronized interplay of neurological signals, muscle contractions and airflow and the result of which meaningful speech emerges. Each word is shaped by complex, rapid interactions of mind and muscle and breath. So no wonder the psalmist said in Psalm 139 that we're fearfully and wonderfully made. Amen. Praise God for this gift of speech. In 2007, there was a study through the University of Arizona. They concluded that the average person speaks around 16,000 words a day. That was regardless of whether you're male or female, that's what the 2007 study said. They've since done a repeated study, that's just come out this year. It's got a larger sample size, it's shown that the number actually decreased slightly. It's around about 13,000 words a day over the last 13 years or so. It's kind of been declining a little bit. Researchers aren't real sure why. They wonder whether it's the rise of digital communication. It's the fact that we're texting and on social media that the number of words per day is kind of dropped off a little bit in favor of the digital communication. Either way, it's still a lot of words. 13,000 on average for any given person per day. We actually listened to far more words than that, approximately 20 to 30,000 words that we process. And with all of that complex neurological and physiological processes involved in our speech taking place, you'd think our words would take a longer time to get out. The reality is it can be far quicker than the kids squeezing out the tube of toothpaste. I'm sure we all agree that words matter. What we say, how we say it, when we choose to say it, even the time in which we say things or the things we don't say, they can all be used, those words, to build people up or to bring them down. Our words can encourage others or discourage them. They can bring about peace and reconciliation or they can tear relationships and communities apart. It's no surprise that the book of Proverbs refers to the tongue, the mouth, the lips, the speech and words over a thousand times across 128 verses. You might be familiar with James, who describes the power of the tiny tongue in James chapter 3. If you haven't read it before, read it this week. We're going to dig into James a little bit later on in term 2. But just by way of a quick summary, James in chapter 3 says, we can harness the power of a horse with a small bit in its mouth. We can steer a big ship with a tiny little rudder. And yet we struggle at times to control our tongues, the words that we say. James 3.2 says, if you can control your tongue, you are mature and able to control your whole body. Left unchecked, James says, the tongue can corrupt the whole person. He goes on to say in verses 8 to 10 that no human being can tame the tongue. It's a restless evil full of deadly poison. With the tongue, we praise our Lord and Father and with it we curse human beings who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. James says, my brothers and sisters, this should not be. James knew it, didn't he? I mean, he'd seen it on that triumphal entry with Jesus heading into Jerusalem. The crowd crying, Hosanna, Hosanna, blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. And then you're not six days later. Many in the crowd crying, crucify, crucify. Praise and cursing from the same mouth. How we to walk wisely as disciples of Jesus when it comes to our words. That's the question we're going to look at this morning. And the first lesson that we're going to learn from Proverbs chapter 10 this morning is that our words flow from the heart. I think this is the first step in understanding God's wisdom for our words. Our words are more than just the words. It's an expression of ourselves. Our words actually flow out from our hearts. I had the privilege of visiting with Bob and Barbara Payne this week at their unit in Sunnymeat. Their age and health prevent them from joining us most Sundays in person. But they tune in online. They pray regularly for the church. They're connected in with us. And they're celebrating their 70th wedding anniversary this week. And it was so encouraging to sit and chat with this couple and ask them how God had been at work in their marriage. These past 70 years. I actually asked them for some tips about marriage because they're 43 years ahead of Kelly and I in their marriage journey. And it was it was a good opportunity. I thought to ask somebody a little bit further along, you know, what have you learned? And how can I learn from what it is that God has been teaching you? One of the things they said was it's important to say sorry and to forgive one another. But it's also really important to say I love you often. To communicate that with actions and words. Now, one could argue that a couple who's been married 70 years would know that they love each other, right? It's still important to say it and hear it, though, was their charge. That was the tip they gave even after 70 years. It's so important to say that I love you. Think about that for a moment. Those of you in the room that are married. However long you've been married. Why is it that no matter how many times we hear those words, we still yearn to hear it? Why is that? I don't think it's because we're insecure or unsure about our partner's feelings. It's not because our memory is failing and we need that little reminder, although maybe later on that might be. But but why do these three little words I love you mean so much? The power lies in the fact that they're not merely words. It's not just lines on a page. It's not just sound waves in our ears. It's not even the communication, the information, the facts. There's something deeper going on here. Our words communicate something of ourselves. When a husband or a wife says to the other, I love you. They're actually taking something of who they are and how they're feeling. And they're gifting it to the other. The I love you means something to the other because it comes from them. It's a revelation of their feelings. It's a declaration of their love for their spouse. And that's why hearing from certain people means more to us than hearing from others. It's words are not just the words. They communicate something of the self. A student can hear the praise from his peers, from his teacher, from the principal, and that can be great. You know, on a wood ceremony, they get all the handshakes and the accolades, that can be great. But man, it's nothing in comparison to after that ceremony hearing the parents say, son or daughter, I'm proud of you, well done. Doesn't that feel so much better? Friends, when we speak to one another, when we write that encouragement letter, when we send that love-heart emoji or that thumbs-up emoji, whatever it is, it's more than just words. We're giving something of ourselves. Jesus said as much in Luke chapter 6 verse 45, he said, a good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart. And an evil man brings evil out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Other translations say out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Solomon got this years before Jesus. Obviously, God had revealed it to him through his wisdom. Proverbs chapter 10 verses 11 and 12, Solomon writes, he says, the mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs. I had a couple of water bottles. I think I got two for the price of one, some there I can't remember. It came as a pack. I chose those particular because I can see the difference in the colors. Those of you that do know me know that I'm color vision impaired. I see shades of colors differently to most folk. And I like these bottles because I can see the contrast in the two different colors. We might disagree on what colors they actually are, but I can tell that they're different. I had left these bottles sitting at the desk for a few days. And I went to get a drink yesterday and I was surprised that I'd mixed up the bottles. The one that I thought I'd filled with fresh water was not the bottle that I drank from. I actually drank from a bottle that had had a bit of water in it a few days ago and had been sitting for a while, it's gone pretty stale and wasn't great. I don't know if you've ever drunk stale water before, it doesn't taste great. But the fresh stuff, that cool, refreshing, recharging, life-giving water that you get, maybe straight from the fridge or from the ice machine or whatever or from the mountain stream, that's the type of living water, the fountain of life that Solomon is kind of picturing here. Just like the mouth of the righteous in Proverbs 10, 11, it's a life-giving fountain, refreshing, recharging, life-giving. Notice that it's not just good words that cause it to be that, but it's because of where it comes from, it springs from a mouth of righteous character. It means it comes from a good heart. I think this is the key to understanding wise words. Like we said earlier, it's not just the words that are said, but it's the heart that's being expressed by those words. Anybody can read a manuscript or words of a teleprompter or whatever set of palm cards. You can write nice words on a card or in a letter to a friend. But if what we say doesn't match up with what's in our heart, then the words are useless. Probably worse than that, the words are a fraud. They're not truthful. It's deceptive, deceitful words. Proverbs 10, 11 shows us that the heart that fears God, the heart that's turned to him, a heart that's been made righteous, not through things that we've done, but through faith in Jesus, that heart that's growing in holiness, their mouth and their words are a fountain of life. These are wise words that flow from a heart that seeks to build up rather than to tear down. And that's the second lesson that we want to understand this morning. God's wisdom for words is that wise words build others up, their life giving, nourishing words. We saw that in verse 11 there. They give life because they're connected through the heart of the righteous person, connected to the very source of life to God himself. God is the fountain that never runs dry. He's the ultimate sustainer. He's the one that if we're connected to him, then his love that's been poured out into our hearts overflows in us and through us so that we can look out for and provide for and seek after the interest of others. It's like Pastor Doug shared with us last week. True worship flows out of this life or this heart that's fully surrendered to Jesus. It's only when we understand God's unconditional love for us that we're able to love God and love others as he's commanded us to live. If we want to walk the path of wisdom when it comes to our words, if we want to be that fountain of life for others, then we need to draw near to and stay connected to the source of life. That's the only way we're going to be able to nourish others with wise words. Have a look down in Proverbs chapter 10 verse 21, the lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of sense. Friends, we can only nourish others by pointing them back to the ultimate source of nourishment and life. We point them to the God who made us, who gave up his life to save us. What a privilege that we have to join in supporting and building up one another as we wait for Jesus. It's a privilege we have to encourage one another, to keep looking at Jesus, to keep walking with him as his disciples. Lord willing, most of us have been recipients at some point or another of words that build us up, wise words, godly words, words that originate in God's word and through our relationship with him. They're the life-giving wise words that encourage and nourish our souls. How nourishing is it for our souls when a brother or sister thanks someone that they see serving the Lord in the life of the local church, when they point each other back to the source of life, when the going gets tough or when life gets hard? How edifying is it when we choose to forgive a brother or a sister that may have grieved us? Or when we sing God's praises together, we look across the room and we spur on as we declare these truths about God that we sing and declare and hold on to together. It's so encouraging. It's beautiful when we join in praying for and with one another as we humble ourselves and ask our Heavenly Father to help us. These are all just little pictures of what it looks like to walk the path of wisdom with our words. Solomon says, the lips of the righteous person are like a fertilizer, nourishing and giving strength and life to others, speaking life into them as we point them back to God's wisdom. There are some other Proverbs, there's just a selection on the slide there. Proverbs 15 verse 4, the soothing tongue is a tree of life. Proverbs 24, 26, an honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. Proverbs 25, 11, a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver. Proverbs 15, 2, the tongue of the wise adorns knowledge. You get the idea, don't you? If you hear this morning or if you're watching online from home, if you consider yourself a disciple of Jesus, we need to ask ourselves in light of God's wisdom for our words. What's the condition of our heart? Is that that's where our words originate from? That's what we need to ask. Is it OK? How's our relationship with our Lord? Maybe we can take the temperature of that by examining the words that come out of our mouth. Is it wise words that we're speaking to our brothers and sisters? Are we seeking by God's grace to be a fountain of life to others, to bring nourishment to many? Or are words self-seeking and putting others down? We have such a gift from God. What a privilege He gives us, the opportunity to speak words of life to one another. There's nothing else in all of creation that gets to do that. Only those of us who've been made in His image. I reckon it's our words that separate us from the animals, possibly more than anything else. Animals surely have ways of communicating with one another. I reckon if we could translate their noises, their vocabulary is probably going to be pretty limited. We've just got a new kitten recently at home, and we had an older cat already. We've got this interesting interplay with this new kitten and this older cat. There's been a fair amount of grumpy old cat hissing noises and growls as this boisterous, perky little kitten just wants to play and explore and get to know the household. Imagine if you could make a cat translator, the most you'd probably get out of our cats would be, hey, I'm over here, come play from the little one, and maybe from the older one it'd be, get lost, this is my territory, maybe either one of them at different times, they kind of seem to have a truce, hey, it looks like there's some food here, come and get it. It might be about all you'd get. Animals tend to communicate out of necessity, whereas we humans have got this God-given capacity to communicate for beauty's sake. To tell stories, to evoke emotions, to make promises, to inspire and encourage, to teach and train and equip others. What an incredible gift from God, to wisely use our words to build others up. We want to be doing that, friends, as wise disciples of Jesus. Wonder when the last time was that you asked someone how they were going in their walk with God. When you encourage someone or spurred them on to keep going. If we don't do that, I think we miss out. It's part of the reason why it's important for us to gather together weekly, to make regular attendance at church, something that's a priority for our family. It's so that we can encourage one another and be encouraged as we wait for Jesus to return. We need each other to speak these words of life. What a fantastic gift and an opportunity our speech can be. I know as your pastor, I've been on the receiving end of many life-giving words of encouragement from so many of you that are sitting in this room. I thank you for taking that opportunity that God gave you to encourage me. You've spurred me on in my faith. And I pray that that's something that becomes a mark of our church as we choose the way of wisdom with our words, that we encourage one another in our walk with Jesus. Such a blessing to receive these words. But then there's a flip side, isn't there? The flip side is that against this path of wisdom, we're offered the path of the wicked, the path of the fool. And that's our third lesson this morning. Their foolish words tear down others and they can destroy a community. We saw that in those first verses. We read from Proverbs chapter 10, verses 11 and 12. The mouth of the wicked conceals violence. Hatred stirs up conflict. But again, a selection of some other proverbs that paint this picture even clearer. Proverbs 15, verses one to two, and verse four. A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly, foolishness, wickedness. Verse four, the soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit. Sure, many of us have been on the receiving end of foolish, wicked words that have crushed our spirit. We know the hurt and the pain of that. Proverbs chapter 12, verses 18. The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Proverbs 17, 27. The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint. And whoever has understanding is even tempered. Or Proverbs 21, 23. Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity. We see the warning here. Proverbs 26, 20. Wood without a fire goes out. Without a gossip, a quarrel dies down. It's pretty clear, isn't it? There's a foolish, wicked path when it comes to our words. And those who walk it, those who are not righteous, those who don't fear God, well, they seek to tear others down and quickly. Instead of providing words of life, foolish mouths instead are concealing or hiding away violence and hatred. Foolish words are untrue. They're slanderous. They're unrestrained. They're often rash and provocative. They can be manipulative. And yet they all have this one purpose, to conceal hatred, to inflict damage, to bring division. Foolish words are spoken to steal the joy of others by inflicting them with ourselves. That's what we have to realize. So often I think we can think of the terrible things that we say as slips of the tongue or things set in the heat of the moment, but we can't escape the reality that these words cause untold harm to those around us. They're not just the product of a mistake or an overreaction. Again, they come from our heart. And often what's happening in our heart in those moments is this desire to force ourselves or our ideas or our beliefs, our rights, our preferences on the other person. Avertly or subconsciously, when we speak those kind of foolish words, it's not a slip of the tongue, but it's coming from our heart. It's designed to inflict others with ourselves. I think if we think back over our day or our week or even go back further, think back over our life, it's probably far more instances where we think to ourselves, I can't believe I said that than there is times when we thought, I can't believe I did that. We don't always get it right. I don't. What I found is, is that when the Lord brings to our attention those moments when our hearts have been out of line and when we've given in to foolish words, it's important to acknowledge our sin, to apologize to the person that we've offended, to confess it to God. If you know that you've done those things, if you've not been wise or careful with your words, then maybe there's even an opportunity for you this morning to do that. The good news or the gospel is that we've already been forgiven. Jesus' death on the cross is sufficient for all our sins. Past, present, future. We read in Proverbs 10, verse 12, that hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs. Last lesson that we need to learn just quickly this morning is that wise words are of great value, but foolish words are worth nothing. Wise words are valuable because they're God's words, because they come from a heart that's connected to Him. I wonder if you've ever heard about the year 2000, $1.10 mule coin. I don't know if there's any coin collectors out there. There's a batch of $1 coins from the year 2000. They were mistakenly produced in the mint. They were stamped on one of the sides on the head side with a $0.10 stamp instead of the $2 stamp. And so it's a little bit smaller. So it creates this kind of double edge around one of the sides of the coin because there was only so few of them produced because it slipped out into circulation before they found and corrected the error. These coins are valuable to collectors. They're worth a lot more than $2. If you happen to find one of these coins, hang on to it, maybe get it apprised, anywhere from $300 to $3,500 for a good one, for a $2 coin. The thing that makes them valuable is their limited quantity. It's like back when we were kids, the cricket memorabilia that would happen during cricket season, they'd often do this kind of limited edition release of memorabilia, whether it was a signed bat or a jersey or a hat or a ball or something, and they'd get all the team to sign it. And the idea is they'd sell it to collectors, it'd be a limited run, and this would be something that would have a value because of the limited number of the thing. In the proverbs, Solomon says something a little bit similar about our words. He says, using restraint in our words, and staying silent at times when it's necessary, can actually make our wise words all the more valuable. We're encouraged to use our words sparingly because what we saw on the flip side was the foolish person doesn't show any restraint at all. We saw that early in Proverbs 17, 27, the one who has knowledge uses words with restraint. Whoever has understanding is even tempered. Have a look again in Proverbs chapter 10, at verse eight, the wise in heart accept commands, but a chattering fool comes to ruin. Well, verse 19 and 20 of Proverbs chapter 10, sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues. The tongue of the righteous is choice silver, but the heart of the wicked is of little value. Solomon gives us this warning here that those of us who like to talk too much, we need to be wary lest we sin. The chattering fool who gushes folly comes to ruin. There's a danger, often because people who love to speak many words. If they're walking the path of the wicked, the path of the foolish, they live with this self deception that their words are the best words, and it's a blessing for them to share their words with the rest of the world. But in reality, it's just more and more worthless words. What are we gonna do? How do we avoid letting our words become foolish and worthless? I think it's helpful at times to pause in the grace of God, to pause between trigger and action, particularly if something has upset us or offended us, pause long and hard enough to pray, to stop and acknowledge that your words have power. Consider how you're gonna use them in that moment is what you're planning to say in love? Is it for the sake of truth? Is it for the good of others? And are you gonna say it in a way that is kind? Or are you gonna spew it out in a way that is harsh and unhelpful? Friends, maturity is so often marked by the distance between being triggered and responding when it comes to wise words. It's a lesson that we need to learn. James tells us in James 1, verses 19 to 20, we're to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Dear brothers and sisters, take note of this. Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Remember we said earlier in Proverbs 15, verses one and two, the gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge. They're thoughtful and measured in the way in which they respond, but the mouth of the fool just gushes fully. It's one of the areas that I'm still growing in. It's an area that I, at times, struggle with. My brain moves pretty fast, and I don't always listen well. There's been times where I've been quick to speak, and I've been slower to listen. I need the Holy Spirit to help me to grow in this area, because Solomon tells us that wisdom listens well before speaking, so that wise words that we do speak are of great value. Jesus is our model for this, isn't he? In all of the areas of discipleship, Jesus modeled it so well, even though Jesus knew the condition of everybody's heart. If he knew what was going on in their lives, he still took the time to listen to them. Now think about the woman at the well at Samaria with multiple partners. The people in the city had kind of snubbed her. She was out drawing water in the middle of the day because obviously they wouldn't let her go, or she was too embarrassed to go when the ladies went earlier in the cool of the day. Jesus takes the time to talk to her, to listen. He spoke to her, and he listened. He gave her the time of day. Think about the woman who came and washed Jesus' feet with her tears and anointed his feet with that expensive perfume. Others condemned her actions and thought she was being wasteful and extravagant. Yet Jesus listened as she thanked him. Passion on her. He spoke wise words of comfort to this woman who'd chosen to worship and give thanks in her own way. We should follow the example of Jesus. As we want to walk as wise disciples, we want to be quick to listen, compassionate, and full of grace as Jesus was. Wisdom is not found in the quantity of our words, but in the quality of words. And all of that goes right back to being rooted in a heart that's built up in God's word. That's where the value is going to come from. In understanding who God is and what He's done and who we are in light of Him and how He's called us to live as His children. It's amazing that only six days after Jesus entered Jerusalem and that drunk donkey to cries of welcome and worship, only six days later, he finds himself in the house of the high priest and in the Roman courts, arrested and on trial. And these Jewish leaders, we can read about that and we'll get to that over the Easter weekend. They were chattering fools. Their words multiplied, their lies grew, their faces were read in angers, attempted to condemn Jesus, even though he committed no sin. The leaders were fools. Their hearts were hard, calloused over wicked. How did Jesus respond? We're going to finish here this morning. 1 Peter chapter two, verses 23 to 24. When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate. When he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to the him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in his body on the cross. So that we might die to sins and live for righteousness. Jesus was confident in God's goodness in his promises, so much so that he could stay silent, didn't have to hurl insults back. He entrusted himself to the one who judges justly. It'd be really easy to get trapped in a war of words, to hurl back when we feel attacked. It's not the way of wisdom, friends. We don't avoid sin by multiplying words, but by being self-controlled and choosing to use our words through that relationship we have with God, through the understanding of his word, to build up and bring life instead of using them to attack and tear down. To do that, we've got to be confident in God's word. We've got to believe in his promises, in his character. If we ever hope to speak wise words, if we want to listen before speaking, our tongues have that real power of life. Like we said with the kids earlier, those who love it will eat its fruit. What that means is we bear the consequences of choosing the path of wisdom or the path of foolishness in our words. Let's be a church of people that walks in wisdom, hey? That encourages and builds up with our words, not tears down. Let's pray. Loving Heavenly Father, we thank you for the hope, for the grace, the mercy that we have in you because of what Christ has accomplished on the cross for our sins. Help us, Lord God, to fear you, to not lose that war and reverence of you, but to be overwhelmed by your grace and mercy towards us. May we be filled with the wisdom of your Holy Spirit, the wisdom of your word, so that our words, the words that we speak will reflect your truth. Help us to use our words wisely, Lord. Help us to speak words of encouragement, words of life and peace to one another. May we choose wise words that build up rather than foolish words that tear down and divide. Lord God, would you cause our speech to bring healing to the broken, comfort to the weary and hope to the discouraged as we tell and declare the hope that we have in Jesus, as we stand on and hold out your promises, as we wait for Christ to return. Lord, would our hearts be so full of your love that our words overflow with your grace and your kindness? May our conversations be led by the Holy Spirit. May we reflect the goodness and the grace of the one who dwells within us. Lord, would our mouths declare your praise and our tongues proclaim your faithfulness all our days. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.